Aug 17
On today's new episode, the Dads go loco for the jalapeno double.

The Dads test out the new voice mail with a drowning drunk dial from Ohio - we hope the caller is still alive, but it doesn't seem like it!

Matt gets some phrase books on Amazon, and is afraid to use them, while D.M. downloads "Nemo" on Amazon so he can cry and cry and cry. The Dads are tired of having their emotions destroyed by manipulated points of light, and Todd's troubles seem too always line up with tragedies in Pixar films.

Speaking of grief - people on Facebook need to get it together, lest the passing of Robin Williams push facebook hystrionics right into madness.

Todd doesn't want to be so out of shape anymore, but his body keeps bringing him to fast food restaurants, sometimes shutting off his brain to make it happen.  He thinks there is one last fit Todd in there somewhere, but it he may have to hit rock bottom to get there, and rock bottom for Todd might mean accidentally crushing one of his children while playing Twister... which almost happened this week.

We've got voice mail now - call us at (347) 766 - FUOM and leave a message!

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 15
Join us as the dads discuss the pros and cons of falling in love with a dumb person. Then check out our new puppet problems at whitedadproblems.com

We've got voice mail now - call us at (347) 766 - FUOM and leave a message!

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 12
D.M.'s kids are 2 and a half and have never slept.  This may explain D.M.  The Engel house is just a giant vaudeville routine involving shuffling toddlers from room to room and falling asleep for minute increments of time on various surfaces.

Over at Todd's house - he new extra Wooly Willy look, shaved head AND no beard, it testing poorly with audiences.  He also just completed his annual non-relaxing vacation with extended family, and is considering renting a pontoon boat in the wilderness, or perhaps going on a vision quest into his dark heart.

We've got voice mail now - call us at (347) 766 - FUOM and leave a message!

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 10

Todd has been on Goddamazon buying his kid's summer reading - which is kid didn't do.  He didn't do his summer journals, either, which raised many questions, including:  WTF is summer journaling?  Does he really have to do this?  How is Todd going to cheat this? Should Matt and D.M. smother their kids before they get to Jr. High?

Matt's going to Europe - perhaps to relax, perhaps to ruin his marriage.  Hard to say.

Speaking of Matt's marriage, it got better this weekend when he and his wife went to a street fair and she got just the right amount drunk - then everything was foiled when Viva needed to poop and all that was available was Port-o-Potties which has "gotten it from both ends."  Hilarity and public evacuation ensues.

We've got voice mail now - call us at (347) 766 - FUOM and leave a message!

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!

Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 06
Hey everyone, 

So, we're back on track this week, sort of. All of last week's episodes are now up and running. 

We had plans to throw some videos your way this week, but iTunes is having its way with our back side, and so instead, we ask that you go to whitedadproblems.com to check out a video that we posted this week. 

Lastly, we have a new voicemail for those of you who'd like to send a question or comment and be heard on the air! Just call 347-766-FUOM, 347-766-3866. 

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 02
D.M. wonders if hating top-notch Jewish comics makes him an anti-Semite. Todd hates white guys who currently host NBC Late Night. This leads to high fives for hating on Zach Braff's new "I make out with hot chicks in this movie" movie.

The dads relive Kevin Ware's leg snap, and D.M. tells of a YouTube video in which a skier breaks his ankles like boiled chicken bones.

A little M17 talk.

Serrated vaginas?

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!
Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Aug 01

D.M. shares an update in which he goes toe to toe with a rampaging racist in a grocery store.

The Dads also see a pick of Dave's dad in the 3rd world hospital, and, indeed, there is SO. MUCH. BLOOD.

Matt visits a magic shop and learns of the bizarre and arcane world of... magic shops.

Then he goes to the movies, where everything is called "Rise of" something, and the bwom trailers are for bible action buddy flicks.

Listen to our show and subscribe on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

ubscribe for free on

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!

Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 28

This week Matt turns off his Amazon Mom account because Viva is almost over diapers - but just what are Pull-Ups?  Some worthless tweener?  The Dads debate.

A twelve year old Todd picked up chicks with the magic of prog rock and bad weed.

Speaking of Todd, he experiments with shaving his goatee, which causes his family not to love him.

Then we invent "Movember: Thirty Days of Cock" - or 31 on Leap Cock.

We ask our gay listeners - stubble on stubble - is it extra painful? Is it a protective layer?  Is it loud? whitedadproblems@gmail.com

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!

Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 25
Here's the hidden track on our album of funny.

The Rocco Family goes to Thorndale Beach on the 4th of July and nearly get blown up by illegal fireworks.

Todd is an old hand at watching illegal fireworks, and he spends most of the summer watching roofs catch fire.

D.M. is amazed that in this day and age there are still illegal fireworks, after all, this is the world where they don't want you to drive tired.

And Todd suggest selling "banana bags" to drunk drivers.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 23

Here's a great new episode for the Todd lovers out there.  Both of you.

Todd locks up his children's skin disease and throws them back in the public waterways.

Then he completely gives up on his vitality and buys a birdfeeder, so he can give $15 worth of seeds a day to birds. But not the black ones (racist!!!!!).

He also has a new way to eat ice cream every day, and has convinced Matt's daughter that ice cream > fruit.

Speaking of Viva, she will pee on your floor and not care one bit.  She's the honey badger of peeing on floors.

And Matt sees a billboard for "abortion juice."  Tasty.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!

Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 21

We're back after a midsummer hiatus. Well, most of most of us are back - Engel is several pounds down after a, shall we say, eventful destination wedding in the Dominican Republic.  There will be blood... and feces.  Lots of blood and feces. And third world hospitals. And lots of yelling in broken Spanish. And blood and feces.

We also talk rat (or maybe lion) poison, handjobs on airplanes, and D.M.'s kids growing past needing their parents.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!

Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 18
I run. You run. We all run - for reruns!

We'll be back Monday - enjoy this old crap!

************************

On Part 3, Viva pees in the potty, but not before using her potty topper as a life preserver.  Todd suggests Matt and D.M. get a "Squatty Potty", because the correct anorectal angle make you poop faster. D.M. thinks pooping faster will take the only moment of peace in a Dad's life and make it shorter.

Then... "butt hymen."

Finally, Matt gets shouted at by another stranger, but this time it isn't a hippie or a vagrant, it's some dick in Starbucks who may or may not hate kids.

...and you get to hear the infamous story of Matt's nearly homicidal fight with another Dad in an outlet mall parking lot.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 16
We're back Monday with new stuff!  Here's old stuff!  And read our latest at Chicago Parent!

**************************

Todd has decided to bequeath some old possessions to his children, including his old comic strip collections and his makeup Kaboodle, bringing up the questions:
1. Was Garfield ever funny?
2. Was Calvin and Hobbes good?
3. Why so many cows, Gary Larson?
4. Family Circus mom - hot?
5. Why does Matt's mom want him to be gay SO MUCH?

But before that, a discussion of BUTT DISEASES old and new, and what to store in that Butt Hold?

D.M.'s in-laws dumped a world of Christmas lights on him, and he's always the last to know schedule changes.  Now he's working not to screw his daughters over on their Christmas birthdays.

Speaking of birthdays, how come teachers got to beat kids on their birthdays in the 70s and 80s, and frequently touched their butts?  That's weird.

Finally we examine D.M.'s gnarly 80's boners.

Don't forget: Second Knuckle for Good Luckle.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 13
We took 4th of July week off to get our hands grafted back onto our wrists, so no new shows this week!  Instead, listen to this one from January and here what was happenin' then.  (Or listen to last weeks episodes that we fucked up and posted late.)

New episodes Monday!

****************************************************

The Dads are back with the first new episode of 2014, and their first new episode past the 100 mark, and it's a doozy - and a three parter!

First off it's a winter time breakdown of the infamous Santa Claus monologue from "Gremlins."

Next the Dads, with the help of some listeners, figure out what happened to Pudding Pops.  We also learn that Matt doesn't know how pudding is made, and that if Todd and Dave ever lived together, they would almost instantly become codependent and Circus fat.

The Dads discuss what a bad idea it is to work with your wife, and how it would be like olfactory fatigue for happiness.

Speaking of happiness, did you know that Todd and his wife once had so much trouble sleep training their kid that they called a SUICIDE HOTLINE?  Listen, ye new parents, and weep.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a mug... or something!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)
Jul 11
In this week's bonus the dads discover three reasons why your wife will cheat on you. Somehow they left off "contempt over road-trip music." Todd thinks cheating is too much work. Dave wonders what it would be like to not love his family, so he could run around town nailing anything that walks on two legs, but he's become too attached follow through.

Then Dave wonders how much it sucked if flat feet kept you out of WWII and you had to spend the rest of your life watching everyone else be in a parade every other day.

Subscribe for free on iTunes and, please, leave us a rating and a review! We're on Twitter @whitedadprobs and have a page on Facebook!

And check out our weekly comic essays each Tuesday at Chicago Parent!

Send us an e-mail we can read on the air! whitedadproblems@gmail.com - we'll send you a random object from D.M.'s house!
Listen Now:


Comments | Embed | Download | Plays (Loading)